What are some of the secrets of you as an adolescent which you want to share?

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Mudassir Ali 10 months 1 Answer 147 views

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  1. I have three situations, but I’m going anonymous because I don’t want to implicate any specific people, and I don’t want certain followers to know this happened. Two are sexually related, the third is not but is probably the worst in my books.

    First example was in an office at a factory. A female coworker who was about 15 years older than I was (I was in my early twenties), asked me to make out with her. I don’t remember the exact wording—it wasn’t that awkward, but it was blunt. I was single at the time, so I agreed, because I thought it would be fun. She pursued that several times at the office, since I had my own office and she was able to sneak in now and then and shut the door for privacy. However, one day she asked to slip away with me at lunch to a nearby park area, which would have been very secluded, and without specifically saying the words, she basically propositioned me for sex. She didn’t use the actual word, but kept saying things like, “we can fool around” and “we’ll see where things go… no one will see us… I want to see more of you.” When I said, “are you sure you want to do that?” I was thinking about the HR implications and whether I was already in over my head because of our kissing fling. She said, “yes, I’m sure… my husband won’t mind because we’re French, and we’re okay with this.” I didn’t know she was married. When I heard her say that, I said, “I don’t think that would be a good idea,” and she replied, “my husband won’t know, and I’m okay with it, and you’re single… I really want to do this with you, let’s go at lunch.” I agreed, and we did. I shouldn’t have. However, I did find out afterwards that she lived with a man, but she was not legally married to him, she just referred to him as her husband, so I didn’t feel as bad about it since there wasn’t actually a marriage. It only happened once, though the “kissing fling” went on for weeks after that.

    Second example was in another office, and a younger coworker, my assistant, asked me to go out for lunch with her to chat. We did that a few times, very casually, then one time she asked to meet for dinner. During dinner, she removed a shoe and placed her leg in my lap from across the table. I honestly thought the lunches were professional, but I’ll admit that dinner felt like she was trying to cross a line. She said nothing when she did that with her foot, but then she asked if I wanted to go shoot pool together after dinner. I agreed, and while there, she kissed my cheek. Again, she said nothing about it, and we didn’t really talk about it. She did it a couple more times that night, and when we parted ways after playing, she planted one on my lips, said good night, and just went home. I was unsure what I was getting myself into, considering that she reported to me. A few days later, she asked to go to a movie with me, and I agreed, and during the movie she leaned over and whispered, “do you think anyone will notice if I sucked you right now?” I said, “yes, we’re in a theatre, and I don’t know if that’s a good idea!” She said, “let’s find out” and proceeded anyway. It was inappropriate, and it shouldn’t have happened, but I let her go ahead with it. It didn’t turn into anything long-term, and she eventually left the company to pursue a better opportunity.

    Third example was a coworker of mine who suggested that we should rotate 10% more of the computers in the company than are necessary annually. We had a 3-year rotation policy, so 1/3 of all computers were replaced each year. However, accounting never actually reviewed the specific number of computers being rotated, nor the cost associated with it, aside from matching to budget. This coworker had two ideas: first, to rotate 10% more than were needed. Second, to order through a third party that in turn ordered from our supplier, so that the invoices could be increased by 10% per machine, and the surplus items could be buried without line items. End result was, we would have been buying approximately 5 to 7 additional computers annually, and paid 10% more on the bill, even though this third party was doing nothing more than paying the bill (they were all going to be purchased in our name anyway, so the supplier was dealing direct with us, but being paid by the third party). However, this suggestion came at a time when the supplier was offering a regular savings of something like 22% for us, because of some pricing changes, so it wound up being that the total dollar cost was so close to the original budgeted amount that no one would have flagged internally. The most inappropriate part of this plan was that this coworker asked me to help him make sure that the systems would be delivered to me instead of the computer technician, which would mean that 60+ computers would be put in my office initially, and then brought to IT, minus the 5 to 7 “spares,” because my office was not in an area of the building that had security cameras on it. His plan was to pay the third party company for fudging the invoice by letting them keep 50% of the markup (which was usually over $12,000), and then to cut him a check for “services” for the other 50%, which was all paid by the company we worked for, to the third party reseller, thinking they were just getting computers. His plan was to then also resell the spare computers (worth about $4k each) using another third party that was aware of the deal, knowing they were getting brand new machines, and they also had a 50/50 split arrangement, so he would then pocket about $2,000, which earned him another 10–14k in cash. The result was that he would take home almost $25,000 extra, and his role was as a technician that earned about $40,000, so the extra 25 was a significant boost. He wanted me to help him continue to commit this fraud in a way that would be less traceable, and to also vouch for the pricing when reviewed in budget meetings (since I was on the company’s leadership team). I found out had actually been doing this for the past 2 years already, but in order to avoid having his teammate in IT flag on the incoming hardware, he had the systems shipped to the third party, and they would skim off the extras, and then re-ship the rest. However, this was an added expense and he was paying it out of the surplus money he was getting, so he was looking for a workaround since the shipment came straight from the suppliers. I said no. I also pulled some weight in the management meetings, and recommended that we switch vendors to another third party that he had no dealings with, and that ended his little scam.

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