What is the most hurtful thing someone has said to you?

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Mudassir Ali 8 months 1 Answer 110 views

Answer ( 1 )

  1. In 2012, my husband and I had been married for 8 years ( together for 12) and had two beautiful daughters, two and four years old. I noticed a sharp decline in my husband’s interest in the children. He stopped asking about our oldest daughter’s therapy (she was born with multiple learning disabilities). He stopped picking them up. Playing with them. Talking to them. When I asked him, he said he was overwhelmed at work.

    One night, while he was in the shower, he received a text and I did something I had never in our marriage had done before. I checked his phone. I saw an exchange between him and his girlfriend. I saw sexual conversations with at least a dozen women. But most hurtful of all was a conversation he had with a woman regarding our children. He said “ I wish I had never become a father. I wish they were like dogs and could be put in a cage. I could just throw kibble in there.”

    I felt like I had been punched in the gut and stabbed in the heart. Our babies. Our blessings, reduced to nothing by their own father. I filed for divorce a week later. He gave up full legal custody without so much as a thought. I didn’t care that he was unfaithful. I didn’t care that he emptied both childrens’ savings accounts for his own pleasures. But I could not fathom those words about his babies. I asked him how he could feel that way. Why did he not love his girls? His actual response was, “ All we do is feed them, give them baths and play stupid f-ing games with them. I am destined for more than that. My life is going to be so much more.”

    I can honestly say that those were the most hurtful words I have ever received. Because I knew that they would never be loved by their father. And one day, they would be old enough to be devastated by that.

    Five years later, he has been married and divorced again. His children barely recognize him. I am not sure if he is living the life he dreamed, but I know I am. I have my two little angels to care for. I only hope I am enough.

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